Postmodern Parenting for Dummies

In the Netherlands, like the Nether regions that it’s likely named after, pedophilia is tut-tutted as understandable, but this isn’t.

The mayor of a Dutch town says the Belgian army is no longer welcome there after soldiers handed out blank ammunition to schoolchildren.

As if your average Dutch man hasn’t been shooting blanks for a while now.

Belgium's Defence Minister Pieter De Crem called the incident "unacceptable". Blanks can be extremely dangerous because they contain gunpowder. If a blank bullet overheats it can explode, causing burns, blindness and damage to hearing.

Oh please. If the villagers were that hysterical that the “offending” country’s Defense Minister (such as that is) had to get involved, what’s to stop you from suggesting to these kids how much fun it would be to goof around with the blanks in their pockets that they’re probably insisting they don’t have. The little tykes probably think they have nukes thanks to the fit that the mayor, a literal kind of agent of the Nanny state in this case, has pitched.

Children proudly showed off the blank rounds to local television. They also described how quantities of ammunition were left lying around.

Even if you’re inclined to believe anything kids say, they aren’t ammunition. They’re BLANKS you chuckleheads.

Paratroopers were captured on CCTV handing out the blank ammunition to inquisitive children.

Can’t have kids being inquisitive now, can we? I mean it’s not like they ever saw a bullet on TV and realize that they shouldn’t eat it or whack it with a hammer.

Look, they’re KIDS. They’ll be fine, and even if they set fire to an eyebrow, you could always make more of them. Yes, that IS actually possible! Some of them like having siblings, and not being over-protected trophies.


Your diligent “Sky News Team”
also doesn’t seem to realize what
blanks actually look like. Their
photo shows a handful of very
UNBLANK rounds.


Doofuses